For this blog post, I’ll depart from my usual format and reminisce about two women (both born in 1931) who were instrumental in bringing non-dual metaphysics (specifically A Course In Miracles) into my life – my mother, Barbara Rawles, and Judy Skutch Whitson, who both passed on last month within a week of each other. I am profoundly grateful to both of them. Both exemplified gracious hospitality to all, kindness, generosity, and were a joy to be around. Both had an insatiable curiosity for life, wanting to know more than the superficial and unsatisfying explanations of the world, leading both through and beyond the study of the paranormal to deeper metaphysical inquiry. Now I have the good fortune to have wonderful memories of both of them, and they live on in my heart and mind (as they do for so many others). This quote from the Course is a great reminder to practice what I learned – from these two very influential people in my life, as well as countless others that both of their lives touched:
“Teach not that I died in vain. Teach rather that I did not die by demonstrating that I live in you.” (ACIM, T-11.VI.7:3-4)
There are many more examples of gracious kindnesses from Judy and Mom that I could share, so I’ll keep it brief – the former spanning only a few years in terms of my in-person interactions, the latter my entire life until a month ago. Here is the memorial page for Judy on the FIP website.
Here’s a quote from Course teacher Jon Mundy (from one of his recent emails) that resonates perfectly with my handful of first-hand interactions with Judy:
“By this time, most folks know about the passing, this past Tuesday, October 19th of our dear, beloved, and beautiful friend Judy Whitson, founder of the Foundation for Inner Peace, the publishers of A Course in Miracles. Judy’s body was 90 years old, but Judy was forever young. She always wore a big smile; her enthusiasm was contagious; she had a BIG HEART, and everyone was ‘Dear’ to her. Judy truly enjoyed her life, and she got to do what she was called to do. She did it well; and there were some miraculous angels who helped her along the way, including her beloved daughter, Tam Morgan.”
… and Jon Mundy’s full tribute to Judy which certainly matches my much shorter in-person acquaintance although I knew of her work publishing the Course shortly after the 3 blue volumes arrived.
Here are the remarks I shared at the memorial for Barbara Rawles on October 30, 2021. She would have turned 90 the following day:
I was going to be spontaneous, which I usually prefer, but in order to not speak for hours about Mom, which I could easily do, I decided this morning to write down just a few vignettes that hopefully convey Mom’s joyous spirit that lives on in our hearts and minds.
Barbara Marie Creveling Rawles was a truly great Mom and a friend to all! I feel so fortunate to have had her for a mom, and I know Gayle and Jim share the same view profoundly as well. The past few years when we’d take turns being here a month at a time, I didn’t HAVE to travel to Livermore to be with her, I GOT to travel to Livermore to be with her; I looked forward to each visit eagerly, because she was so appreciative. She appreciated everyone, not just immediate family, but that was certainly the solid foundation that her very extended family was built upon.
Mom had a wonderful sense of humor; she loved wordplay and puns. Growing up in a family of teachers and linguists, combined with Dad’s heritage of growing up in a similar family that made up their own language (Boontling), Mom encouraged our love of reading, the power of words to broaden perspectives, entertain and inspire. Mom’s puns – sometimes double or triple, where the 3rd hidden pun would emerge days later after further reflection – were happily contagious; she encouraged – or many might say exacerbated – that trait in us. (Smile.)
When Mom quit smoking, she transferred the nervous energy of putting cigarettes in her mouth to sunflower seeds, so for a year or so, we were surrounded by huge piles of sunflower seed shells, a welcome change! Since Grandpa Creveling (who I never met) lived in Mexico where they celebrate the “Day of the Dead” on November 1 – the day after Mom’s birthday – and set up little shrines of their favorite foods, we had a little shrine here recently with a candle surrounded by a few of her favorite “go-to snacks” – Clif Bars, Fritos, and Trader Joe’s granola. Mom’s longevity, despite being a “bionic woman” with a sizable laundry list of medical conditions and prescriptions to match, is a testament to her sheer force of will and tenacity, and perhaps a partial rebuttal to getting too fanatical about nutrition. (Smile.)
Mom loved movies, art, theater, and the theater of the mind. She brought us to Beethoven, Beach Boys, and Beatles, introducing us to classical, pop and so much more. She embraced new genres like electronic music. She gave me books like “Secrets of the Great Pyramid” which became part of the confluence of inspirations that led to our trip together in 1992 where 21 of us in a tour led by Gregg Braden would get to explore the inner passageways and chambers of the Great Pyramid near Giza, Egypt a few days after Nancy & I were married in an outdoor temple dedicated to love and beauty. We were so honored to have Mom there to share that and so much more with us!
Mom was a friend to everyone – a true egalitarian. She was open-minded – she loved the great INDOORS (of the mind); as a voracious reader with an agile mind, she seemed conversant in just about anything, enjoyed history, travel, and subjects too numerous to catalog, although she tried as evidenced by her numerous binders of copious notes and lists everywhere. In the Egyptian pantheon, the “god” Thoth was purported to have invented writing. Thoth would have smiled on Mom!
Interested in everything and EVERYONE, she was also very versatile; she cooked yummy meals, baked goodies for charity, gave hair cuts to us kids and the neighbor’s kids, painted landscapes, and drew pen & ink sketches of real estate and local historical scenes. She always jumped at the opportunity to be helpful, gracious, and extend hospitality to all. My memories of Mom are typified by good-natured fun times; she gave herself fully to everything and everyone she was involved in. If she ever held grudges or grievances, they were very short-lived at most. I can’t seem to recall any, but throngs of memories of kinship and kindness abound.
I’ve relayed this next story to more friends than I can count since I think it was symbolic of mom’s out-of-this-world interests. When she was a teenager on Catalina Island visiting her grandmother, one day on the beach she and numerous others there, saw a fleet of VERY fast-moving craft make abrupt right-angle turns and disappear. This led to a fascination with anything having to do with UFOs and later (during my teenage years) this resurfaced as a more general interest in metaphysics and many related “New Age” topics. This exposure to metaphysics and other ways of looking at life and the world was profoundly helpful to me personally, and to countless friends who shared similar interests over many decades. Her community involvement, social immersion, and outstanding networker/hospitality role-model influence on both family and friends is inestimable.
The aforementioned Egypt trip in 1992 was life-changing and transformative and led to my renewed interest in what became known as sacred geometry, thanks to her nurturing my interest with books like “This Living Earth” by David Cavagnaro; that led to me writing a couple of books, the second of which she meticulously edited – Grandma Gomma did superb editing work before the Grammarly app came along!
She logged lengthy volunteer involvement in programs like Creative Dynamics, teaching Leadership and Human Relations classes at DVI (Duell Vocational Institute) in Tracy; I was privileged to share that with her as a helper for a few weeks when I was home from college for the summer as part of her many volunteer years in that organization. Her model of generous altruism that turned prisons into classrooms was a lasting gift.
New Frontiers (which Nancy & I “cloned” to make a Gold Country branch) further deepened the interest and the extended communities, with Mom always seeming to be the pivotal catalyst at the center. She was the quintessential networker! We shared and conversed at length about hundreds of books, audiotapes, videos and so much more. Not just a great mom, she was my spiritual mentor literally from day 1!
To conclude (and make this mercifully shorter), I’ll share a favorite quote, preceded by an episode that typifies Mom’s good-spirited nature. One day, Dad, recalling the title of an abysmally hokey 1956 sci-fi flick, entered the room where Mom was hosting her long-standing metaphysical study group with her loving friends. Not in a mean-spirited but rather a playful way, he suggested that the group could call themselves, “Fire Maidens of Outer Space“. Instead of recoiling in horror, it backfired, and they enthusiastically embraced that new label.
This quote is from one of the many hundreds of books that Mom and I enjoyed over a half-century of shared interests:
“How can you who are so holy suffer? ²All your past except its beauty is gone, and nothing is left but a blessing. ³I have saved all your kindnesses and every loving thought you ever had. ⁴I have purified them of the errors that hid their light, and kept them for you in their own perfect radiance. ⁵They are beyond destruction and beyond guilt. ⁶They came from the Holy Spirit within you, and we know what God creates is eternal. ⁷You can indeed depart in peace because I have loved you as I loved myself. ⁸You go with my blessing and for my blessing. ⁹Hold it and share it, that it may always be ours. ¹⁰I place the peace of God in your heart and in your hands, to hold and share. ¹¹The heart is pure to hold it, and the hands are strong to give it. ¹²We cannot lose. ¹³My judgment is as strong as the wisdom of God, in Whose Heart and Hands we have our being. ¹⁴His quiet children are His blessed Sons. ¹⁵The Thoughts of God are with you.” T-5.IV.8:1-15
Toward the end of her life in this world, for a few weeks, she had difficulty speaking intelligibly. However, even though we couldn’t understand 99% of what she was trying to say, the words she DID enunciate quite clearly were “Thank you” and “I love you” to family and friends who visited. Those WERE the important words! Hearing those, we weren’t concerned about deciphering the rest. The gratitude and love are SO VERY MUTUAL, Mom!
Mom, thank you for being our favorite space cadet, mentor, nurturer, and so much more, and helping all of us extend the kindly foundation of true family to astronomical dimensions.
We love you, Mom!
Here is the obituary that appeared in the local (Livermore, California) newspaper for Barbara Rawles:
BARBARA CREVELING RAWLES
1931-2021
Barbara was born in Dallas, Texas, the first of three children, to DeWitt and Julia Creveling. Following a move to Davis, California, the family settled in the small farming town of Dinuba where she had an idyllic youth. Her parents were both schoolteachers and, in fact, Barbara took high school Spanish from her father. Her mother instilled a love of music–Barbara learned to play the piano and ukulele. She had a natural gift for drawing. Her job as an usherette at the local movie theater started a lifelong passion–she became a movie buff. Family and friends enjoyed her huge, cataloged collection of old movies.
During high school and college, one of Barbara’s favorite activities was acting in theater productions, ranging from “Hay Fever” to “Macbeth.” At Fresno State College, where she earned a BA in Education, she met Donald Rawles of Oakdale, California. It was love at first sight and they married soon after graduation. The couple moved to College Station, Texas, where Don became a flight instructor for the USAF at Bryan AFB and Barbara gave birth to their first two children.
In 1957, the family moved to Livermore, where Don began his career at Lawrence Livermore Lab. They lived in a tight-knit neighborhood of Rad-Lab folks where “everybody knew your name.” Baby number three arrived and Barbara beautifully juggled full-time parenting with a variety of community volunteer work. Some of the many organizations she volunteered for over the years were: AAUW, Mulberry Branch of Children’s Hospital of Oakland, Livermore Art Association, Livermore-Amador Symphony Guild, and the Presbyterian Church. For years she was active in local and state political campaigns. She also taught classes in “Leadership and Human Relations” (Creative Dynamics) to inmates at DVI prison in Tracy.
She developed her skill as an artist by studying watercolor painting and became known for her pen and ink drawings of historic sites. Barbara sold her work locally and was commissioned to make real estate drawings. Many a Christmas card she sent was an original pen and ink drawing, and she often gave her paintings as wedding gifts.
Barbara loved to cook and frequently entertained neighbors, friends, and colleagues that Don would invite home from work. Her kitchen was always open, and the food was delicious!
Barbara and Don had a wonderful group of Livermore friends with whom they played bridge, cooked gourmet meals, played tennis, and traveled. Favorite travels Barbara made in her lifetime included Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean, Alaska, Egypt, and several trips to Europe.
She was especially interested in health, spiritual, and metaphysical studies. In addition to participating as a student and teacher in the Creative Dynamics program, she was a founder of the group “New Frontiers” in the 1990s. For decades, she had weekly meditation meetings with friends who had similar interests and became an important mentor in the lives of many.
Devoted to her family as well as to the community, she thoroughly enjoyed being “Gomma” to 8 grandchildren and 5 great-grandchildren. She is survived by her children Bruce, Gayle, and James, her sister Anita, and her brother DeWitt. Don preceded her in death, in 1985.
Barbara was warm, welcoming, inclusive, entertaining, interesting, and had a wonderful sense of humor. She blessed the lives of every one of her family and friends.
Donations in Barbara’s memory may be made to Children’s Hospital Branches, 5700 Martin Luther King Jr. Way, Oakland, CA 94609, or online at www.childrenshospitalbranches.org/donate