Editor’s note: This guest post is from Bede Draper, a student of both ACIM and the non-dual teachings of Advaita Vedanta. He studied the latter in India with Dayananda Saraswati (Arsha Vidya) and is now an active participant in School For A Course In Miracles classes.
Okay, so the end goal of A Course in Miracles—and I think we need to know what it is because, if we don’t know what it is, as Dayananda says, we won’t be able to find the means. The end goal is the awakening to love’s presence. The Course says that very clearly, and everything else has to be understood in the light of that goal.
If the goal is the awakening to love’s presence, then the means must be whatever removes the hindrances to that awakening. That’s exactly what the Course says. The purpose of the Course is to remove the hindrances that prevent the recognition and appreciation of love’s presence. So, the question naturally becomes, what removes those hindrances? I think the answer is very simple. It is the wisdom of Jesus coming alive in us as a new mind. That’s what we’re really dealing with.
Seeing Through the Eyes of the Body
Now, the thing is this. Can we, through the eyes of the body, see God? I don’t think we can, because ourselves as a body simply haven’t got spiritual eyes. As a body, I’ve got material eyes, and those eyes are ordered towards seeing material experiences. They allow me to see the road in front of me, other people, buildings, trees and everything else that belongs to the world of appearances. That’s what the senses are for.
But the Course makes a distinction that I think is very important. There is the world of appearances that the senses present to us, and then there is what the Course calls the world I see. The world of appearances simply arrives. We don’t make it happen. It is just there. But immediately behind those appearances comes the world I’m seeing, the meaning I’m giving to those appearances, the interpretation I’m placing upon them. That is the world I actually live in.
The World I See
When we look at the horrors that are happening in the world, it’s very easy to conclude that there is no God. But notice what’s happened. I’m no longer simply looking at appearances. I’m now looking at the world I see, a world without God. I’ve interpreted the appearances, and now I’m enclosed within that interpretation. I don’t even realise that I’m looking through my own beliefs.
The Course is saying that the world I see is a projection of beliefs and the will to be separate that exist in the mind. But we’re completely unconscious of that. As far as we’re concerned, we’re enclosed in being a body living in a world of bodies. We take our life and being to be the body itself, and because we do that, we never question the world we’re seeing. We simply assume that it is reality.
The Problem Is Not Having a Body
Now, this doesn’t mean that liberation is getting rid of the body. I don’t think that’s true at all. If liberation meant not having a body, then liberation could only occur when we’re dead, and that’s just the old-time religion. I don’t think that’s what the Course is teaching.
The problem isn’t that I have a body. The problem is that I’m identified with the body. When I’m identified with the body, I literally take myself to be my thoughts, my feelings, and my bodily experiences. That’s where the mistake occurs. The body itself isn’t the problem. My identification with it is the problem.
Becoming the Thought
Take a very ordinary example. Suppose I have the thought, “person XYZ is a so-and-so.” The moment that thought arises and I identify with it, a dualistic world immediately appears. There is now XYZ, the judged person, and there is me, the poor victim looking at XYZ. That whole world springs into existence the moment I become identified with the thought.
Notice that I don’t usually stand back and observe the thought. I simply become it. If I think XYZ is a so-and-so, I am not aware of that thought. I just have the experience that XYZ really is a so-and-so. The thought has become my reality. I’m not aware that it’s a thought occurring in the mind. I’m completely identified with it, and because I’m identified with it, I’m now living inside the world that thought has created.
The same thing happens with feelings. I don’t say, “There is loneliness present.” I say, “I am lonely.” I don’t say, “The body feels cold.” I say, “I’m cold.” Notice what has happened. I have become identified with the feeling or the bodily sensation. I am no longer aware that these are experiences. I have become the experience. That’s what I mean by being mindless.
Mindlessly Living as a Body
So here I am. I’m walking down the road, living my ordinary life, and as far as I’m concerned, I’m simply being a material body in a material world. I believe that the world I’m experiencing is being caused by what’s happening to me. It never occurs to me that the world I see is coming from me as a mind. That’s completely outside my awareness.
We’re not aware of ourselves as a mind. All we’re aware of is ourselves living mindlessly in a world that seems to be producing our experiences. The world appears to give rise to how I feel, what I think, and how I experience myself. There doesn’t seem to be a mind behind any of it.
That is why the Course is not directed to me as a body. It can’t be. As a body, I’m always frightened. I’m full of cravings. I’m constantly seeking happiness and security in the material world. That whole activity keeps me glued to the body because I’m actively being a body in the world. That activity is what I mean by being mindless.
The strange thing is that, while I’m being mindless, it doesn’t appear that I’m mindless. As a body, I cannot see that I’m mindless because, as far as I’m concerned, I’m simply being real. My experience seems completely obvious. I don’t stand back from it. I don’t question it. I simply live it.
The Memory of God’s Love
Now, luckily, something else is present within this dream of separation. Into the dream I bring with me the memory of God’s love. I think that’s a beautiful idea because it means I’m never completely cut off. Even though I’m lost in the dream of being a body, the memory of God’s love remains quietly present.
This dream of living as a body is what Aristotle would have called the necessary effect. We don’t deliberately create it. It’s simply the inevitable consequence of believing that we’re separate and apart from God, believing that we’re guilty, and believing that one day we’re going to be punished for it. Given those beliefs, living as a vulnerable body in a vulnerable world is simply the natural consequence.
So, the problem isn’t the body. The problem is that my mind, as an ignorant mind, becomes invisible when that mind that I am is projected as the experience I am facing; I’m completely identified with the body. When I’m lost in the body, I’m mindless. I don’t know that, as a mind, I carry the beliefs in sin, guilt, and fear. I don’t know that I have this deep wish to exist separately from God. None of that is available to me while I’m actively being a body.
The Movie Projector and the Movie
The beliefs in the mind- sin, guilt, and fear and the desire to be separate and apart from God in order to have my own “BE” get projected as myself as a mind-sense-body complex who is lonely, self-hating, or guilty and fearful. The mind is like the movie projector, and the movie that appears on the screen is the body and the world I experience. We are always looking at an outward picture of an inward condition.
There’s very little point in trying to change the movie while ignoring the projector. The movie simply reflects whatever is in the projector. Unless the content in the mind changes, the projection will continue to appear exactly as before. That’s why we’re destined to keep repeating the same experience while we continue believing the same things.
The reason we become so absorbed in the world is that it protects our mindlessness. We don’t want to get near the mind because the mind contains guilt, and to become aware of that guilt feels as though punishment will immediately follow. We’re frightened of arriving at ourselves as a mind. So, we place a veil between ourselves as a mind and the material universe, and then we spend our lives being enclosed within the veil instead of the problem behind it.
Why Changing the Projection Isn’t Enough
This is why I said psychotherapy doesn’t ultimately solve the problem. It tries to improve or repair the mind-sense-body complex, but the mind-sense-body complex is itself a projection. It is the projection of an ignorant and wilful mind that is determined to have its own existence separate and apart from God. As long as that fundamental wish remains unchanged, the projection may alter its form, but the underlying problem remains exactly the same.
If I want my own separate existence, I first have to believe that I really am separate from God. In effect, I have to murder God in order to establish myself (of course I can’t, but I can imagine I have). That produces an all-pervasive ontological guilt. Having left the invulnerability of God, I now experience myself as deeply vulnerable. I also expect punishment because I believe I have done something terribly wrong. That whole structure belongs to the mind, not to the body.
Appreciating Ourselves as Mind
Now, this is a difficult thing for people to grasp because we can only really know ourselves as a mind when we’re being mindful. As far as we’re concerned, we’re actively being a body, and that activity keeps our attention fixed on the world. We blame the world, we feel victimised by it, and we become convinced that our misery is being caused by something or somebody outside ourselves. All the time, we’re hiding from the fact that we’re actually doing this to ourselves.
We’re completely convinced that the experience we’re facing is causing our upset. We believe the blame belongs somewhere else. In one sense it’s a fantastic arrangement because it keeps us from ever looking where the problem really is. But there’s no hope in that arrangement because, if the cause is always outside me, there’s nothing I can do except keep trying to rearrange the world.
So, the obvious question becomes, how do we begin to appreciate ourselves as a mind? We’ve been saying that the mind is where the problem is located, but we’ve also been saying that we’re mindless. So, what can I possibly do as a body struggling in the world? The answer is that, AS a body, there’s nothing I can do. The body doesn’t do anything in the spiritual sense because it is simply the mindless projection of the mind.
The Difference Between a Body and a Listening Mind
This is where one of Dayananda’s distinctions helped me enormously. He made a very clear distinction between ourselves as a body and ourselves as a listening mind. He spoke about ourselves as a simple conscious person. That is something quite different from this mindless mind-sense-body complex that continually dramatizes sin, guilt and fear.
The body can certainly become more comfortable. For example, suppose I feel socially isolated and disapproved of. Perhaps I’m a little dyslexic, perhaps I’m a little Asperger’s, and then I learn social skills that help me gain approval. Outwardly, my life begins to come together. The form has changed, and I may feel much happier, but fundamentally nothing has changed. I’m still being a body. My identity hasn’t shifted at all.
That’s why I think it’s so important not to confuse improvement in the projection with transformation of the mind. The projection may become much more pleasant, but the underlying identification remains exactly the same. I’m still taking myself to be a body living in a material world.
The Beginning of the Spiritual Search
Then something very interesting starts to happen. A dissatisfaction begins to enter the dream. It isn’t dissatisfaction with one particular circumstance. It isn’t simply that I want a better job, a better relationship, or a better experience. It’s a dissatisfaction with the whole arrangement. There is this sense that there must be another way because this whole setup of being a body, destined for old age, sickness, and death, doesn’t really satisfy.
Something in us begins to ask, “Is this it? Is this really as good as it gets?” I think that’s a very important moment because it marks the beginning of the spiritual search. It isn’t the search for a better experience. It’s the recognition that the whole pattern of seeking happiness as a body isn’t working.
I think that impulse is actually a reflection, within the material dream, of the memory of God’s Love. It appears as the thought, “There must be a better way than this.” That thought doesn’t come from the body’s cravings. It reflects the memory of God’s love continually calling us home. It’s the operation of wisdom beginning to work in our lives, even before we understand what is happening.
Why We Are Drawn to a Spiritual Teaching
This is why we suddenly find ourselves attracted to a spiritual teaching. We discover A Course in Miracles, or perhaps we travel to India, or we become interested in something that speaks to us in a completely different way. I don’t think that’s an accident. It is simply another expression of the desire to go home.
Something in the teaching attracts us because the Course is speaking to us as a mind that still carries the memory of God’s love. It isn’t addressing us as a body trying to become successful in the world. If all I’m interested in is preserving myself as a body, the Course has very little appeal because it isn’t helping me become a more successful body. The Course, on the other hand, is calling me to wake up from the dream of being a body.
As soon as I’m born as a body, old age, sickness, and death are already part of the arrangement. It doesn’t matter how successful I become; that outcome remains. So, myself as a body isn’t naturally interested in waking up. Myself as a body is interested in becoming a successful body. But something deeper than the body is drawn to the Course, and I think that is the memory of God’s love quietly calling us home.
Listening with an Open Mind
So here I am. I come across A Course in Miracles. Outwardly, it looks as though I’m simply picking up a book. But something much deeper is happening. What is drawing me to the book is the memory of God’s love. Something in me recognises something in it. I find it attractive because it is speaking to the part of me that wants to go home. It isn’t speaking to me as a body trying to improve itself. It’s speaking to me as a mind that still carries the memory of God’s love.
The Course does not address us as a body. It can’t. The Course is addressing us as a mind with the memory of God’s love. If I’m completely dominated by the cravings of the body and my whole interest is self-preservation, then why would I be interested in waking up from the dream? I wouldn’t. I’d be interested in becoming a more successful body. It is only because something deeper is active in me that I find myself attracted to a teaching like this.
So I begin to read. I begin to listen. I begin exposing my mind to another way of understanding. That is where another of Dayananda’s insights becomes very important. He used to say that the Lord has given us the capacity to suspend judgment. He said that faith is the suspension of judgment pending discovery. I’ve always thought that was a beautiful description of faith because it doesn’t ask me to believe blindly. It simply asks me to remain open long enough to discover whether something is true.
Becoming a Listening Mind
As I begin listening in this way, something changes. When I take Jesus’ hand and simply say, “Please help me understand,” I’m no longer operating as a body trying to solve its own problems. I’m now being an open mind. I’m listening. I’m pondering. I’m examining. That is a completely different state from being mindlessly identified with the body.
Notice that I haven’t become enlightened. I haven’t solved the problem. But I am no longer being the same kind of mind. Before, I was a mind completely identified with the mind-sense-body complex. Now I’m becoming a listening mind. I’m becoming available to wisdom. I think that is the first real movement towards awakening because I’m no longer completely enclosed within my own interpretations.
Awakening to Love’s Presence
Now I want to come back to the main subject because this is what I really wanted to talk about today. The goal of the Course is awakening to Love’s Presence by removing the hindrances to it. That awakening doesn’t happen only at the end of the forgiveness process. It can begin while I’m reading the Course itself. It can begin while I’m quietly listening. I can suddenly come alive to the fact that, right here, right now, there is only the Presence of God.
Once that understanding begins to dawn, something very important has happened. That wisdom is now governing me. Instead of my own ignorance determining how I see everything, the wisdom of Jesus begins determining how I see. When the understanding arises that, right here, right now, as I am, there is only the presence of God, am I likely to continue chasing some future experience called enlightenment? I don’t think I am.
Understanding Must Come Before Abiding
In order to abide in the appreciation of Love’s Presence, certain understandings have to arise. There is a certain wisdom that has to become alive in me. I have to become a mind governed by that wisdom instead of a mind governed by ignorance. The very first understanding is this: Any action I take as a body simply produces a bodily result. This is a law.
If I, as a body, start thinking and doing what I believe are spiritual actions, then I am still believing that I, as a body, can become enlightened. Do you see the problem? The body can never awaken to God because the body belongs to the dream. That’s why it is so important to distinguish between ourselves AS a body and ourselves AS a simple conscious mind. Until that distinction becomes clear, we’ll continue expecting the body to accomplish something it can never accomplish.
Even as we begin to understand this, notice what happens. The moment you genuinely see that yourself as a body can do absolutely nothing to awaken itself, something in you pauses. There is a quiet stopping. That isn’t resignation. It is the wisdom of Jesus beginning to open your eyes. You’re beginning to see your situation through spiritual understanding instead of through the body’s blinding interpretations.
Awakening Begins with Understanding
The interesting thing is that, when you really see that yourself as a body can do absolutely nothing to solve the problem of human life, there is a pause. You stop. You’re no longer striving in the same way because the wisdom of Jesus is allowing you to see your situation with spiritual eyes. You’re beginning to understand that the body cannot solve the problem of being a body. The body can only seek satisfying experiences and avoid unsatisfying ones. That is all it can ever do.
When I begin to see that, I also begin to see that my whole life, as a body, has been a mindless charade. It has been the projection of an error that exists in the mind. That doesn’t mean I condemn myself. It simply means I begin to understand where the real problem is located. The problem isn’t in the projection. The problem is in the content of the mind that gives rise to the projection.
So here I am, wanting to awaken to the presence of God’s Love because that is the goal of the Course. If that is the goal, then I have to turn towards it. I have to cease being active as this mind-sense-body complex. I have to stop believing that my activity as a body is going to bring about awakening. That is the movement the Course is inviting us to make.
The Presence of God Is Already Here
Now, if I cease being active as a mind-sense-body complex, do I create the presence of God? No. The presence of God is already here. It simply becomes evident. That is a very important distinction because we spend so much of our lives trying to produce spiritual experiences. We imagine that somehow we have to make God become Present. But God doesn’t become Present. God is already Present.
Can I produce the presence of God? No. But I can certainly be blind to it. That’s what being a body is. Being a body is blindness to the presence of God. As long as I’m actively identified as a body, I cannot appreciate what has always been here because my attention is completely absorbed in maintaining the dream.
The Course tells us that the presence of God is available for recognition and appreciation right here, right now, exactly as we are. When I’m at home in God, I’m simply being myself. I’m reflecting the truth of Christ, which is perfect oneness with God. So, the solution isn’t somewhere else. The location of the solution is right here, in what I am being at this very moment.
We’re also told that the fullness of God that we’re seeking is already here. Our identity as the Son of God is perfectly intact. Those aren’t ideas that we’re supposed to admire from a distance. They are the wisdom that gradually begins to govern our lives. As that wisdom becomes alive in us, we begin to look at ourselves very differently.
Doing Nothing to Fix Myself as a Body
Now suppose I suddenly find myself upset and angry. The question is, what do I do? My whole life I’ve immediately tried to fix myself. I’ve tried to improve myself. I’ve tried to become a better version of myself. But the Course says something very different. If I make any move to fix myself up as an angry body, I’m making that angry self real. That’s one of the principles of the Course.
So now I’m being governed by the wisdom of Jesus instead of my own habits. The wisdom says something very simple. If I remain active as a body trying to fix myself, I’ll simply keep the dream alive. I’ll keep myself blind to God because my whole attention is still centred on preserving myself as a body. The wisdom gently says, “Don’t do that.”
I ask you now to simply ponder this for a moment. Right here, in this very situation, there is absolutely nothing I can do to make God become evident to me. Just notice what happens when you really consider that. Any attempt to adjust my present state is simply more activity of myself as a body, and that activity keeps me blind to the Love that is already Present.
Do this for a couple of minutes.
Did you notice a relaxation become evident? No trying to relax but simply BEING relaxed. This is very significant because, to some degree, you have ceased being a body. You no longer felt the need to do something about yourself. Why? Because the wisdom was governing you. That is what it means to be governed by the wisdom of Jesus. His way of seeing quietly becomes our way of seeing. We SEE that we can do nothing so we find ourselves doing nothing.
Remaining with the Experience
You may have noticed that you were simply being drawn into the Presence of Being. You weren’t being a thinker or a struggler anymore. This is a very important observation because that’s exactly what begins to happen. You’re no longer trying to solve yourself. You’re no longer trying to become something else. You’re simply Being.
Now I want to bring it back to a very practical situation. Suppose here I am in a really miserable state. Suppose I’m feeling a deep loneliness. Normally, my whole life has been organised around getting away from that loneliness. I immediately start looking for some way of escaping it, distracting myself from it, analysing it or fixing it. That’s been my normal pattern for most of my life.
But now the wisdom of Jesus begins to govern me. That wisdom tells me something completely different. It tells me that the loneliness isn’t the real problem. The loneliness is an experience. It belongs to the projection. The real problem is that, as a mind, I believe I am separate and apart from God. That belief is what is producing the experience. The experience itself isn’t the problem.
Notice what is happening. I’m now looking at my situation through Jesus’ eyes. Without the Course, I wouldn’t even know to do this. I would simply remain convinced that the experience itself was my problem. But now the wisdom of Jesus is showing me that the experience is pointing to something much deeper. It is pointing to the belief that I have a separate existence from God.
Remaining Quietly with Myself
Once I understand that, I have no choice but to remain quietly with my misery. There is a principle of Dayananda’s that helped me enormously. He used to say that you can only know wholeness when you’re being whole. If I immediately run away from my misery, I’m not remaining whole. I’m splitting myself. I’m creating one part that is trying to escape another part.
So I remain with myself exactly as I am. I remain with the misery. I don’t move away from it because I understand that every movement away makes the projection seem more real. I may be able to distract myself. I might watch a good television programme and forget my loneliness for a while. I might think I’ve found the answer. But all I’ve really done is keep the misery at bay. I’ve avoided seeing what is actually going on.
Now I can simply see that I’m feeling miserable, and I remain with that fact. The Wisdom of Jesus tells me that I’m not suffering from anything real. I’m suffering from the idea that I’m separate and apart from God. The experience isn’t my real problem. The thought is the problem. The will to have my own existence apart from God is the problem. That’s where my attention begins to turn.
“Please Help Me See”
So now something very simple happens. I turn to the Living Presence that IS Jesus, and I say, “Please help me see. Please give me the eyes to see the presence of God because I can’t.” Notice what has happened. I’m not trying to produce an experience. I’m not trying to force myself into peace. I’m simply asking for another way of seeing. I am now wanting to receive the Wisdom, and because of that wanting I am opening my mind to receive it.
The interesting thing is that I’m now doing nothing. I’m not trying not to do something. I’m literally doing nothing because the understanding itself has brought me to stillness. I’m no longer being a body trying to fix a body. I’m being a mind quietly present with the experience, without friction, without fighting it, without analysing it, and without trying to change it.
The spiritual understanding tells me that the fullness of God is present right here, right now, precisely where I am. It also tells me that the only reason I’m blind to that presence is that I’m busy being a body. I’m identified with the projection because, as a mind, I still believe that I’m separate and apart from God. That understanding quietly changes everything because it tells me where to look and, just as importantly, where not to look.
Letting God Take Up All the Room
So here I am. I simply remain. I’m living from this understanding that right here, where the problem is “There Is Only God”. I see that this is my only salvation. If I remain exactly where I am and cease being a body that is struggling, striving, hoping, and wishing, then my real nature will become evident. I don’t make it happen. It simply becomes apparent, just as a cork held under water rises naturally to the surface once it is released.
At that point, I simply let God take up all the room. I do absolutely nothing. I’m not trying to become spiritual. I’m not trying to manufacture the presence of God. I’m simply allowing myself to receive the Presence that is already here. In fact, it feels less like I’m going to God and more like God is drawing me in. Because we carry the memory of God’s love within us, there is something in us that naturally responds to that drawing.
The Purpose of the Metaphysics
Now, this brings us back to the purpose of the metaphysics in A Course in Miracles. The metaphysics isn’t there so that I can make grand statements like, “I’m a perfect child of God,” and then simply repeat them to myself. I can say those words until kingdom come. I can express them as metaphysical ideas, but by themselves they have no value to me. What has value is that when I’m resting in God, I am appreciating this spiritual fact in its reflected form.
When I’m appreciating myself as being at home with myself because I’m at home in God, that’s an entirely different thing. I’m no longer talking to myself using metaphysics. What’s happened is that I’ve awakened to Love’s Presence. I can now rest in that Love, and when I’m resting in that Love, right here, right now, as I am, that’s what gives me release. It isn’t the metaphysics itself that gives me release. It is awakening to the Presence of God.
The metaphysics helps because it tells me that God is all-pervasive. Despite appearances, the presence of God is always here. It is always available for recognition and appreciation. That understanding becomes enormously important because it tells me that the solution is never somewhere else. The solution is always the appreciation of the Presence of God that is already here.
The Presence of God Is the Transformative Factor
In fact, I think the only thing that transforms us as individuals is the Presence of God appreciated. That is the transformative factor. The whole teaching of Jesus through the Course is to open our eyes to the Presence of God by removing the hindrances. Once the Presence of God becomes something we can actually appreciate and rest in, a tremendous change takes place because we now have somewhere to go. We can take refuge in God from then on if we find ourselves troubled.
Once we understand that this is what is truly Good, this is what is truly valuable, then we begin to understand all the different forms of suffering in a completely different way. If I find myself suffering, I no longer think, “I’m suffering because of this circumstance,” or, “I’m suffering because of that person.” I understand that I’m suffering from one thing only. I’ve fallen away from resting in God. I’ve lost sight of His presence. That is my only problem.
Do you see what that does? Suddenly every form of suffering has the same underlying meaning. It isn’t the experience I’m having. It isn’t the story I’m telling myself about the experience. The problem is always that I’ve fallen away from resting in God. I’ve become separate from the awareness of the Love that is always present. That’s what suffering now means to me.
Resting in God Becomes the Benchmark
Once I know what it means to rest in God, I now have a benchmark. I know what peace actually is. I know what it feels like to be at home with myself because I’m at home in God. That changes everything because now I can immediately recognise when I’ve moved away from that Peace.
When I’m resting in God, I’m not opposing anything. There’s no friction. I’m not fighting life. I’m at home with myself because to be at home in God is to be at home with myself. That’s why I keep saying that this resolves all my problems. It resolves them because it changes the place FROM which I’m living. Now a new life is available to me.
I’m no longer trying to solve one problem after another. I’m simply returning to the one place where there are no problems. Once I know that place through my own experience, it becomes the reference point for my whole life. Whenever I lose my peace, I know exactly what has happened. I’ve stopped resting in God, and I know exactly where I need to return.
The Journey Comes Back to One Thing
So, the whole journey keeps coming back to one thing. The purpose of the Course is to awaken us to Love’s presence. The Wisdom of Jesus opens our eyes to that Presence, and once we begin appreciating it, our whole understanding of ourselves changes. We stop looking to the world for refuge because we’ve discovered a refuge that cannot be disturbed by the world.
That doesn’t mean the world disappears. It doesn’t mean experiences stop happening. It means that I now have somewhere to rest that isn’t dependent upon the world. I can take refuge in God. When I’m resting there, I’m released from my grievances about the past, my fears about the future, and my self-hatred in the present. That is what the Course is leading us towards, and I think that is what awakening to Love’s Presence really means.
Living from the Presence of God
Once I have that benchmark, I can begin to understand my life in a completely different way. Instead of continually trying to fix one problem after another, I simply ask myself one question: “Am I resting in God?” If the answer is yes, then I’m at home with myself. If the answer is no, then I know where the problem lies. It isn’t in the circumstances. It isn’t in other people. It isn’t in my body. I’ve simply fallen away from the awareness of God’s Presence.
This changes the whole way I use the metaphysics. The metaphysics is no longer something I believe for its own sake. I use it to understand what is happening with me right here, right now, as I am. It helps me penetrate beyond the experience that I think is my problem so that I can see where the problem really is. Once I see where the problem really is, then it can be resolved, and I can return to resting in God.
When I’m resting in God, it’s like heaven on earth. As an individual, I’m released from my grievances about the past, my fears about the future, and my self-hatred in the present. Those things simply aren’t governing me anymore because something else has become the governing principle of my life. The presence of God has become more real to me than the stories I normally tell myself.
This is all true, but it must be remembered that I can fall away, and will fall away from this resting place again and again. Doesn’t matter because I know I will be called back when the living Wisdom that is Jesus opens up in me and taps me on the shoulder and reminds me where my true home is.
Seeing Through Different Eyes
Normally, I create a world that is meaningful to me through the meanings I project onto it. I look at people and decide they’re against me. I decide the world is unfair. I decide that I’m only a physical body. All of those meanings become the world that I live in. The world I see is really the meanings that I have projected onto the world of appearances.
If I want that world to change, I don’t actually have to change the world. I have to begin seeing through a different set of eyes. When I’m seeing only through my own eyes, I’m enclosed in separation. I’m caught up in my own interpretations. But when I begin seeing through the eyes of Jesus, the whole world takes on a different meaning because it is now being interpreted through Wisdom and Love instead of fear.
That’s why I don’t think it’s helpful to tell someone who is suffering that the world isn’t real anyway. That doesn’t resolve suffering. The proper use of metaphysics is to help me understand what my suffering really is. I usually think that my suffering is the painful experience I’m having. The Course is teaching me that my suffering comes from the beliefs that I’m separate and apart from God, that I’m somehow evil at the core and destined for punishment. Those are beliefs, and those beliefs produce the experience.
The Experience Is Not the Problem
Once I begin to understand that, my attention starts to shift. Instead of remaining absorbed in the experience, I begin looking at the beliefs that are producing the experience. The experience itself is no longer the problem. It’s pointing me towards the real problem, which is the way I’m thinking. The metaphysics helps me make that shift because it enables me to see beyond appearances into what is actually happening in my own mind.
Then I can resolve the real problem instead of continually trying to manage the symptoms. As I do that, I naturally return to resting in God. When I’m resting in God, I know what it means to be at home with myself. I know what it means to be free from grievances, free from fear, and free from self-hatred. That becomes a living experience rather than simply another idea in the Course.
I think that’s the whole direction of the teaching. The metaphysics isn’t an end in itself. It serves one purpose only. It opens my eyes to the ever-present love of God so that I can stop living from separation and begin living from the Peace that has always been here.
Summary
Right here, right now, I find myself disturbed. I now go through a process of removing the hindrances to Love’s Presence. The hindrance called blaming, the hindrance of self-hatred or guilt. The hindrance of thinking that I am a body, and so on and so on. When these hindrances are removed right now, right here, through the Wisdom of Jesus coming alive in me as a new mind, we awaken to the Presence of God. Now we have found our refuge, our true home, and our practice becomes returning to this refuge any time we see that we have lost sight of the Peace and Love of God.